


The Story Of Us

by shooting_star16



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Academy Era, Alternate Universe - Gangsters, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Awkward Dates, Big Gay Love Story, Dating, Double Dating, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Falling In Love, First Dates, Fraternities & Sororities, High School, Love/Hate, M/M, Modern Era, Modern Middle Earth, Multi, Songfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-26
Updated: 2015-01-31
Packaged: 2018-03-08 15:13:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3213764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shooting_star16/pseuds/shooting_star16
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Small but terrible student, Bilbo Baggins only wanted to have his own high school romance to write. He did not intend to begin the first chapter inside Arkenstone Academy, a  dumping site for obnoxious, delinquent teens who had serious personality issues.</p><p>Getting thrown by snot-filled tissue papers was bad enough. Meeting the infamous Durin Ten was bad news.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAHA YEAH. English is not my first language, please excuse my grammar mistakes. Also if someone would like to be a beta-reader than it's a go go.
> 
> By the way, this story contains explicit language. Some heavy,some not. Just watch out! 
> 
> Happy reading, folks

"Now, wait just a minute!"

Several people inside the Shire Herald room stopped whatever they're doing and craned their neck towards Bilbo, who was indignantly towering over their editor, Mr. Elrond's mahogany desk. Apparently, Bilbo slammed his hands against the desk that his nerve endings screamed in protest. His snowy white palms, redding with pain.

"That's what is indicated here, I'm afraid that we have no choice but to follow." Mr. Elrond frowned at the papers he was shuffling, as if doing so would make the terrible news change it's course. His smooth, silky voice was everlastingly calm but there was a hint of disapproval, puzzlement displease mingling with it as he spoke.

Of course, who would call that news 'pleasant'? Every parcel, every envelope, every letters bearing the name Arkenstone Academy together with that appalling official school seal of theirs which was something closely resembling a disfigured dick more than anything is bad news. The letter says that the Annual Regional Writing Competition is going to be held at Arkenstone Academy, which means that all representatives from competing schools shall spend a month in that dreaded academy as a policy. And oh boy, Bilbo had the right to sulk for he was one of Hobbiton High's pride and glory.

 

"I understand your prejudice, Bilbo." Mr. Elrond said after a while. He folded the letter with a mournful sigh and stared at it hopelessly. He smiled at his subordinate sympathetically who in turn, scrunched his nose in disgust, still staring at the letter, wishing for it to just explode along with the wretched school. "But we have no power to thwart the Chair. However, another news might cheer you up a bit, guess who are we sending out as your partner?"

As if on cue, a small bespectacled boy entered the room awkwardly. He was adjusting his glasses on one hand while the other clutch a bunch of bond papers.

"Ori!" Bilbo piped in happily upon the sight of his bestfriend. "I didn't know Mr. Elrond marked you as qualified." he joked lovingly. Instead of being offended, Ori laughed and flashed him an unlikely smirk. They have been friends since kindergarten and they developed this kind of habit of saying cruel, hurtful things to each other as a joke.

"What a baboon." Ori replied, sliding the papers inside a clear folder and submitting it gently to Mr. Elrond.

"Ori's latest piece was outstanding." Mr. Elrond commented, resulting a heart swelling, proud smile from Ori who looked like he just swam the Antarctic Ocean in five days. "The faculty even passed it around as a past time reading material." Mr. Elrond said.

"Really?! So that explains the additional points from Ms. Galadriel earlier!" Ori squeaked happily at his best friend. He gave him a menacing ' _now-we're-equal'_ look followed by a suggestive eyebrow wiggling.

"Indeed." Their editor answered, now punching the dials of the organization's phone. "Now, I'd like the two of you to go home and pack. You will be leaving tomorrow and I'll assign Mr. Brown to go with you and to coach you. Good luck and do your best!"

 

=================================================

For the nth time, Bilbo threw his paper disgustingly on his study table that night. Feeling a slight pain on the back of his neck, he rotated his head from side to side and let out a satisfied sigh when he heard a small 'crack'. He sat back down on his swivel chair and stared at the clock. It was now twelve forty-five in the midnight and his things were still sprawled on his bed, unpacked.

Upon hearing his yet again school representation, his mother Belladonna took the entire family-Bilbo, his mum and dad-out to dinner to celebrate. Like Ori, whose euphoria from picking him as another school contestant was still on the clouds, his parents did not mind that the school host is the nastiest high school in town. They waived his anxiety away, saying that students are not allowed to 'touch' representatives from other school otherwise they'll land on a serious major offense.

Then they shared ideas. Bilbo told them that the mechanics would be spawning a story regarding a given on-the-spot genre. If the host wanted a horror story, they must conceive a thousand-word story on an instant. If they wanted comedy, they do the same. Someone from the office actually tipped him off that this year's focus must be 'Romance' judging from the cycle. His mother and father, who had a sweet yet ordinary love story encouraged him to write theirs. Bilbo politely declined and explained that theirs was too 'old school'. That what he needed was something like a twist of fate or something unusual with a small hint of suspense.

And here he is, crumpling his millionth piece of paper and throwing them on the overflowing trash bin. His brain hurt from wracking it too much ever since they came home hours ago. From the forbidden rich-girl poor-boy vice versa to falling in love with your own teacher, he had raked through cliched plots and points but his story remained as bland as a dieting girl's salad. Bilbo took a deep breath and tried to discover the root of all his problems, the factor that has been blocking his mind. Ori dropped him a message thirty minutes ago just to say goodnight and that he's ready for tomorrow.

Poor kid. His best friend might've been struggling like him as well. It is difficult to write a romantic story if a writer does not possess 'inspiration' or 'experience' in which neither of them had. Bilbo never let the idea of courting someone or going out with someone enter his mind. In his opinion, girls from his school were just too boring and too plastic, sporting fake tans and dyed blondes and shit. It is hard finding someone who does not make it a point to toss her blonde hair everytime, smacking his face in the process.

And poor Ori who had no match for him either. He says that he's just utterly revolted with the concept of dating and that he's too frightened to ask anyone out.

Not to mention they will stay at the most horrendous school ever known.

Arkenstone Academy is a school flocked by rich kids with hopeless problems. They are those who are actually dropped out, kicked out, level repeaters or just plain diabolic. It is a school with no morals, using money as the most fundamental cell to continue it's regime. The adults from it's staff and other schools deny this accusations of course, claiming that they are also a school dedicated in honing their student's talents and individual styles.

Piss off. More like violent fighting styles.

Bilbo winced as he tried to envision himself walking along the blasted corridors full of vandals and garbage, sticky gums and boogers on the wall, several people openly making out, teachers picking a fight with co-teachers, janitors banging student's heads with a broomstick just for fun, classes full of party booze..

The possibility are all endless. His alleged cause of death would be endless too.

But thankfully, no such case happened as of yet and Bilbo hoped and prayed that there never will be.

He heaved himself off his desk and padded towards his bed. Glancing at the clock, it was now one in the morning and he still had to pack. Slowly and tiredly, he began scooping his clothes and rolled them before tucking them safely inside his large duffel bag. Before anything else, he was already feeling hopeless in winning the competition this year. How was he suppose to have his inspiration when he would be surrounded by creatures spawned from the lowest depths of hell for the next thirty days? If they wanted a horror story then he would ace it.

It took him fifteen minutes to pack his essentials. When he finally laid himself to bed, it felt like only seconds have passed before he was shaken awake by his mother who was buzzing excitedly. Bilbo groaned and checked his alarm clock, it was only six thirty in the morning. Belladonna fussed about what's left of his unpacked things then he ushered him to breakfast after a quick shower. When Bilbo came down, there were already platefuls of pancakes,eggs, sausages and sandwiches laden on the table.

His father Bungo was hidden behind the morning newspaper. He still had his night robes on as he groggily sip his cup of strong, black coffee. The doorbell rang, thinking that it must be Ori, Bilbo stood up to invite him for breakfast but he was greeted instead by a bouncing teenager who also had bagfuls of belongings.

"Drogo?" Bilbo squinted his eyes at his cousin who sat himself on the table and began to attack the poor eggs at once.

"Hey, cuz." Drogo said between mouthfuls of bread. "I came here as your temporary replacement and the temporary heir of your folks!"

"Drogo will stay here for a while." piped in Belladonna, who was carrying another tray of donuts much to the lustful delight of his husband who eagerly put down his paper.

"Whatever." Bilbo rolled his eyes. "Just make sure you don't ravage my room, don't download porn, don't touch my books, the desk is off limits, don't date the fishes in the aquarium, don't open the windows, don't fit my clothes, don't defile my cabinet, basically speaking only the bed is allowed."

Drogo snorted on his juice. "You're cruel, Bilbo." he joked.

 

At seven thirty, Bungo and Drogo-who insisted to come along-drove him to school just in time. Students were lazily filing out from the yellow school bus on the curb, some were still yawning and just basically dragging themselves into the hallway. Bilbo felt momentarily glad that he was not off for lessons.

His father and his cousin helped him unload his baggage, setting them down gently on the ground before taking turns saying goodbye to him.

 

"Bilbo! Bilbo!" a shriek came from afar. Running excitedly towards them was Ori, in his usual knitted cardigan, wheeling his trolley bag. "Hey Mr. Bungo, hey uh-Drogo?!" he greeted, squinting his eyes at Bilbo's cousin who just smirked at the little man.

"Now remember, Bilbo. Do not hesitate to call us if ever you need something, we're just one dial away. And good luck to the both of you, make sure to beat the hell out of everyone! Now off you go, the two of you or my boss will bury me alive!" Bungo said, eagerly pushing his son away before he start to tear up. A month is a very long time for a parent.

"Bye dad! Send my regards to mom! Bye Drogo, DON'T.DOWNLOAD. PORN!" he warned his cousin who began to crack up loudly. The last time Drogo sat in front of his computer, Bilbo began receiving emails from ten or so different porn sites that night, thanking him for signing up and encouraging him to upgrade 'Premium'.

 

When they turned back towards the car, he could hear his cousin loudly muttering to his uncle about a 'nice waffle place' into which his father just grunted his disapproval. Bilbo shook his head and took his bag then beckoned Ori towards the white van parked in front of the school fountain. The driver smiled at them and told them to wait for Mr. Brown who still had unfinished business in his office and deposit their bags at the back. They decided to cross the street to grab a tall glass of Starbucks to pass the time.

"Bilbo aren't you just excited?!" Ori spazzed, the cup in his hand threatening to spill it's contents (Ori doesn't have a thing for cup covers). They were now crossing the street back to school to prepare for their departure. They could make out a weary Radagast from afar, running like it's the end of the world towards the van, the driver who was assisting him with his baggage, on his wake. "A month away from school?"

"Not exactly." Bilbo admitted, licking the cream off the rim of his cup. "Especially when Arkenstone Academy is concerned." he frown upon uttering the name of the abhorrent school for maniacs. He felt an unexplainable twist inside his stomach like someone was playing a lazy game of tug-of-war using his intestines,

"What is it with that school, anyway? Why do you hate it?" Ori asked. As soon as the driver saw them, he reached out for the door and smiled, allowing them to enter with ease. Bilbo did not answer as Radagast was already settling himself on his seat beside the driver.

"Ah. Good morning, boys." As opposed to what he looked like, Radagast was actually full of energy as he smiled to them and beckoned for them to seat comfortably behind them. "We'll stop by Pancake House later for a brunch, it's just beside Arkenstone." he wheezed and proceeded to toggle the radio buttons. Much to their surprise, he stopped on a station currently playing the song of the all-too familiar female voice.

_I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us_  
 _How we met and the sparks flew instantly_  
 _And people would say they're the lucky ones_  


 Bilbo sighed and leaned on his seat comfortably, gazing at the window. They were now passing through the downtown streets, the buildings reflected on the van's windows.

_I used to know my place was a spot next to you_  
 _Now I'm searching the room for an empty seat_  
 _'Cause lately I don't even know what page you're on.._

 

_"Damn. Even Taylor Swift can write a better plot than I could."_

 

Not for the last time Bilbo wrung his brains out for just an idea, just a tiny speck of idea for a unique story; but all he could see is the never ending story of a man and woman meeting and falling in love, just like that. That was what TV programs are showing nowadays anyway. He cringed at the thought of writing another vampire-Twilitish story but seeing that half the world's population hated Edward  and Bella-or Bella's facial expression, he discarded the idea on his imaginary trash bin. He fell into stupor and eventually to an uneasy sleep afterwards.

 

===========================================

The office door banged not too pleasantly. Gandalf Greyhame, the longtime principal of Arkenstone Academy looked up from the documents he was reviewing and smiled at his visitor who managed to return it with a smirk. Without further invitation, his visitor slumped himself on the soft couch by the large windowpane and rested his long legs on the marble coffee table in front of him.

"So?" the visitor growled, puffing out a smoke from the cigarette dangling on his lips. "I hope this is not another discussion about the offenses I do everyday." he scoffed, giving the principal a stern look with his piercing midnight blue eyes.

Gandalf chuckled and fished out a vintage cigarette from his desk, lighting it with his expensive cigarette lighter which is a gift from one of the students who committed a serious offense. He smiled to himself as he took the pleasurable first puff, he swiveled his chair sideways and stared through the large window where his visitor lay nonchalantly on his French couch. Gandalf passed his gaze through him and watched the hovering white clouds outside.

Ah yes, the couch was a gift from the one who is currently occupying it; because that is how a principal of Arkenstone Academy is blessed. Most people say that the school is made up of garbage students, disposed from different parts of the world due to their wicked personalities. He had admitted low level murderers, ex-convicts, people with hopeless academic records. For riffraffs who are shunned from their world, this was their heaven, their sanctuary. And as their 'offering' for their beloved principal, they gave him gifts; gifts beyond immeasurable costs for normal people. Of course, as a human being, Gandalf knows the weight of monstrosity the school carries, but it's not as if they have completely turned their backs on morality, goodness and safety.

Which is why a certain someone is here on his office today.

"This isn't about you, Thorin." Gandalf answered after a long silence, never averting his gaze from the sky which somehow transitioned from bright blue to a dull gray. Thorin made an impatient clicking of his tongue and tapped his cigarette on the ashtray with a tinge of annoyance.

"If this isn't about me then what am I doing here in your hellhole?" the boy shot back bluntly. "I have many things to do and this isn't time for any jokes, Gandalf."

"No, you're right." the principal agreed, returning his gaze back on the papers. "You're here for an assignment."

"An assignment?" Thorin scowled at Gandalf as he pulled himself into a sitting position, lingering on the word as if it was foreign to him.

"You all know that we're hosting the Annual Regional Writing Competition, right?"

"Don't know and don't care." snarled Thorin coldly, puffing out another cloud of smoke.

"Manners, Thorin." said Gandalf unnecessarily, smiling at the papers instead at his visitor. "A delegation will arrive from Hobbiton High this afternoon and what I would like you and your friends to do is to make sure no harm befalls on the guest. That is all."

"What makes you think I will do it?" the blue-eyed boy replied icily, giving his principal a deadly, suffocating stare. If looks could only kill, he could commit a mass murder every minute. But Gandalf, who was surprisingly immune with Thorin's diabolic eyes merely shrugged and continued signing the papers on his desk.

"What makes you think I can't ban your fraternity, Oakenshield?"

For once, Thorin looked slightly taken aback. He spit his cigarette out into the ashtray and crushed it furiously with his fingers, imagining it as the old man's own body. If there is one thing he'd dedicate his whole life to protect, it was the bond of Durin Ten, his brotherhood. He had spent ten miserable years just to make friends, just to lead a band of brave men taking the world head on. From his tender youth, he struggled to talk to people, he struggled with loneliness; from the start, people backed away from him even his own family because of the barbarism he possess.

He is a violent monster craving for hostility

One by one, his friends from kindergarten, his relatives and then his family stayed away from him. He was left alone and friendless for years until life gave him his heart's first desire. Someone who could understand.

 

_"Hey, why are you crying?"_

_Little Thorin looked up and wiped his tears from his eyes, enabling him to see the big boy standing in front of him. His buzz cut head tilted and he was staring at him strangely._

_"F-frerin..beat me t-to musical statues." he sniffed, not bothering to wipe the fresh batch of tears streaming down his chubby cheeks. What's the use?_

_"But why are you alone? Where is your mother?" the bigger boy asked, stooping himself low so he could look at him clearly. It was Thorin's youngest sister's first birthday and because of the very special occasion, they invited all their friends and relatives. Despite being alone, Thorin knew all the kids. He had watched them play from his bedroom's window. But he had never seen this boy before, was he the one the adults call as the guardian angel?_

_"Th-they're outside." Thorin answered, looking away. He hugged his knees and buried his head on his arms._

_"Hey, don't hide!" the bigger boy growled like a wild cat. "I'm Dwalin by the way, my mommy said we're distant cousins or something. You're Thorin, right?"_

_Surprised that someone knew him, he nodded shyly._

_"Why are you alone?" Dwalin asked again, sitting himself in front of his new found cousin._

_"People don't want me there." Thorin confessed, his expression slightly hardening. "Th-they s-stay away from me b-because I-I'm..different."_

_Dwalin blinked._

_"They said I might hurt the other kids, I told them I won't and I only do fighting because of bad monsters." Thorin sniffed again and wiped his button nose on his favorite bunny shirt. Dwalin fished out a bear-patterned hanky from his khaki shorts and offered it to Thorin, their small hands touching._

_"Monsters do not live under the bed. They're bad people who do bad things." Dwalin said knowingly, patting his cousin's knee. "I do fighting too because I want to protect my mommy and by big bro but I'm not bad." he smiled, revealing a missing tooth. Thorin reminded him of his favorite cartoon character he watch on TV, he began to laugh._

_"That's better." Dwalin grinned wider, showing another tooth missing and another one chipped. "Come, I'll show you to my big bro Balin, he's at the library. Let's ask him to read us stories! What do you like?" he offered his hand to his smaller cousin who took it happily._

_"I like Lion King." Thorin smiled as he brush the dusts off his butt. "Someday, I want to be a king!"_

_"Eh?! That's impossible!" Dwalin shot back, his eyes widening in surprise and disbelief. "You've got to ask someone to make you a crown first and you have to build a castle!"_

_"No you don't!" interjected Thorin, his thin eyebrows furrowing. "I want to rule a mountain! I'll build a kingdom under the mountain!"_

_"That's impossible!"_

_The two boys lead themselves to the kitchen, grabbing cold packs of orange juice, milk and chocolate chip cookies before they padded towards the big library at the topmost floor of the Durin manor. They bickered all the way whether it's possible or not to build a castle under a mountain._

 

It was the beginning of an unlikely bond between the cousins but Thorin knew deep in his heart that it was one of the most precious moments in his life. When someone understood him that it is not wrong to meet the world head on. When he met Balin and Dwalin, his resolve grew for the brothers shared his ideals as well. His lonely world was invaded by two, until the years passed and their little group of three became ten. With his honed confidence and leadership skill, he bound different kinds of men from different walks of life until their brotherhood was created and solidified by their unwavering willpower to watch each other's backs.

Loyalty. Honor. A willing heart.

Even if they are slumped into the most hellish school to exist, these qualities remain to themselves. And that is why he'll do everything, from washing dishes to babysitting kids, just to keep their brotherhood in line.

 

"Tell me what do I have to do." he grunted at the principal. Gandalf, now looking happier beckoned for him to come closer to his desk and instructed him to sit. He unearthed a large, clear book from one of the drawers and laid it in front of Thorin. He flipped it open and smiled in satisfaction as he reached his destination.

"This." the old man grumbled, pointing at a two by two sized picture stapled at the top right corner of the page. "Is Bilbo Baggins, a delegate from Hobbiton High."

Pulling the clear book closer to him, he stared at the person he was suppose to protect. "Weird name. But she's pretty." he commented casually, pushing the clear book back. Gandalf frowned at him and shook his head, his grey beard swaying along.

"He's not a girl, Thorin Oakenshield." he said indignantly, as if he just threw him the most vulgar insult to exist. " However, I've been told that he's..err..small that is why he's left defenseless ever someone attack him and that is where you come in."

"But what makes you think he'll be attacked?" Thorin inquired. For some reason, there was a force provoking him to look at this Bilbo once more. He pulled the clear book towards him and stared at the picture intently, his Durin nose just a mere inch away.

The guy was beautiful, no doubt about that. Whether photoshopped or not, his skin looked extremely fair and flawless, bringing out the color of his curly locks. Thorin reckoned it was golden brown. His eyes are big and bubbly, a cross between sky blue and grassy green.

"W-well, you know... t-the reputation o-of our school." answered Gandalf,suddenly interested with his nails.

Thorin, however was not buying the shit.

"Take that mask off for me, will ya? Old geezer." he hissed in irritation, tired of dealing with the old man's fuzzy talk.

"Fine." Gandalf snapped, looking directly at his icy cold eyes. He slammed the fountain pen on his desk and stood up, pacing his room towards the giant windowpane. The sky turned grayer, the clouds heavy with rain water but the street below was still full of life, oblivious to the sky's burden. The honking of the cars was faintly audible, each zigzagging their way to get out of the traffic. One of those might be one of the competing schools, one of those might be their very important guest.

"I'm going to tell you the essentials, but just that." Gandalf began with a stern voice. Thorin grunted as a response. "Baggins is a big name here, Thorin. Some students here knew why but they are strictly forbidden to speak of it. But the time finally came, just as I feared that a Baggins must set foot inside this school. The decision of the Chair to hold the contest here was something I cannot contradict. We are left with no choice. Aside from that, I didn't know Bilbo Baggins would be one of the contenders. If he had not been, then I wouldn't have to bother you right now." he pried his eyes from the window and smiled at the boy sitting on the chair, the latter's expression in puzzlement.

"But why-"

"I cannot speak of it, Thorin. Please understand that. It's enough that some already knew about it. For Mr. Baggins's safety, please stick to your assignment. After this, I'm going to sign your profile for your graduation." his voice was almost pleading, something so alien, something so peculiar to Thorin. But his eyes lit with desire as soon as Gandalf promised him his goddamned diploma. He had been on his last year in high school for three years now, surely something like a diploma would make his parents proud even if it's falsely bought.

Thorin nodded. "Affirmative. I shall inform the others, then." He stood up and bowed with mock respect before allowing himself to cross the room and reach for the double mahogany door to exit himself, he closed the door with a tremendous bang.

Inside the room, Gandalf collapsed on the sofa weakly. He massaged his head which is throbbing like a nervous heart beat.

For sure, he'll deeply regret giving Thorin Oakenshield the easy way out after the whole affair is over. For sure, the school would contribute another berserker to the society. But he had no other choice, Bilbo Baggins does not know about the looming danger waiting for him.

======================================================

Bilbo had been holding his breath for a while now.

They had finally entered the dreaded school, it's tall black iron gates screeching raucously as if to announce to the whole school that 'Hey, bitches! The loser has finally arrived! Bwahaha!'

It succeeded though, their van was greeted by horde and horde of students who were all staring at them like godforsaken souls who did not make it to the Light. Bilbo almost wanted to tell the driver to circle the drive way five more times to help ward off the crowd, but the deed was done and they all have to climb down the van for the school to officially welcome them.

"Alright, boys." Radagast blurted out excitedly, grabbing his baggage like they just checked in at a luxurious beach resort. "Grab your things and we'll wait at the lobby. While you're at it, make sure to greet the people warmly, okay? Boy, I hope they serve coconut juice at the waiting area."

Oh Jesus, he really think that this is a grand vacation.

Bilbo and Ori, who had gone pale from the long journey nodded quite politely. They heaved their heavy bags and followed Radagast inside a large, receiving area and wow, despite being nervous as he was, Bilbo cannot deny the modern beauty of this limbo.

It's like going back to the Victorian era. There was a large chandelier dangling from the ceiling with heavy murals and gold linings, the oak front desk was meticulously polished and varnished with high-quality gloss paint. The floor was fully carpeted, large cushions were placed everywhere and what's more-there's a butler available at your service.

"Wow!" Ori whispered, taking in everything around him. " I wish I had another extra pair of eyes!"

"We're writing a love story, friend not horror." Bilbo replied, trying his hardest not to show his awe and amazement. He had come here to fight for his school's glory, not to feel at home with the enemy's territory. As far as he's concerned, he had no right to bask himself in the comforts of this inferno. Unlike Radagast and Ori, he stayed behind by the archway and chose to wait for further instructions there. Both his companions paid no heed to him as drinks, as per Radagast's request, coconut juice were dutifully served to them.

At long last, an old man in a gray business suit emerged from the double doors opposite them. He was tall, intimidating and sophisticated. Nevertheless, he had put on a pleasant smile upon meeting them. Radagast choked on his drink and set the glass down quickly, standing to his feet abruptly to shake the newly arrived man's veined hand.

 

"From Hobbiton High, I take it?" the man inquired. As opposed to what Bilbo thought of his voice would be, the man's tone was gentle and bright with no tinge of arrogance or belittlement. Perhaps he should work on his 'first impressions' better.

"Yes, yes!" Radagast fondly wheezed as if the man just asked his hand for marriage. "These are our champions, Mr. Ori Ri and Mr.Bilbo Baggins."

Perhaps it was just his imagination but Bilbo saw something glint in the old man's eyes. He was frightened, at the same time an odd sense of familiarity was seeping inside him.

"Have I seen him before?"

No, that's impossible. If he's someone he knew, he'd remember. He had always been gifted with a sharp mind, for sure he could recall him if he knew him.

And yet..

 

"Please." the old man's voice snapped Bilbo back. "Call me Gandalf, I'm the principal of this school and let me take you for a snack after you've unpacked your things. Lindir here will help you." he gestured at the uniformed youth who somehow looked like he had been constipated for days. Lindir bowed and briefly disappeared from the room. When he came back, he was now pushing a large golden cart with majestic carvings.

"Allow me to put your belongings in here." he said politely, heaving the bags off the floor. As soon as he did though, Bilbo swore that he saw his expression shift from uneasiness to extreme uneasiness. Bilbo wondered if that is the same face he makes whenever he drop his bombs on the toilet. "Ugh..heavy." he panted, instantly loosing the air of professionalism.

Ori laughed at him apologetically. "We're sorry, we have to stay here for a month."

"No...worries." LIndir panted, placing the last of the bags into his cart. Completely oblivious to Lindir's suffering, Radagast insisted on riding the thing until they arrive at his own room. Poor Lindir had to wheel double his weight for five minutes as they all made their way to Radagast's quarters.

They came to a halt in front of a double door suite. Radagast bounced out of the cart excitedly, almost knocking his head on the metal. Lindir brought out a card from his pocket and swiped on a rectangular switch-like thing at the right side of the door. As soon as the card was swiped, the red light blinking lazily faintly buzzed and turned green. Radagast pushed the door open and trembled upon the sight of breathtaking suite.

Without a warning, he bid them goodbye and slammed the door 'peacefully' in their faces. Lindir shook his head in defeat.

"Your room is just as beautiful." he said, starting to wheel the cart once more. They are in the middle of their way when Bilbo suddenly felt a dire call of nature.

"Can't it wait?" Ori said impatiently, eyeing Bilbo's jewel like it sprouted an extra twin. "How far are we, anyway?" he turned to Lindir who was also impatiently tapping on the cart.

"Might as well go." he sighed to Bilbo. "Meet us in room 201, East Wing. Turn to your left and pass through the open corridor, there's a restroom at the farthest end."

Bilbo waived them off and bolted to his left where he entered another black archway. The corridor was crowded with students either enjoying their breaks or just plain cutting classes, but that was not the worst of it. They are cutting classes and making out with anyone they come across with. Some were huddled together in a small group, laughing boisterously. The wind was thick with colorful curses and swear words people threw at each other. A classroom door banged open and a boy twice his size almost knocked him off at his feet as he bolted away from another larger boy who was gripping a club on his hand. 

The boy caught his prey and smacked him with the club on his butt, the latter yelling madly. Across the courtyard was another open corridor, Bilbo could make out several students howling and shoving two people-a boy and a girl-in the middle of their circle.

"Undress, you slut!" a high-pitched female voice screeched followed by a thunderous laughter and whooping from the boys. "You have no problem doing it last night!" the bitch continued with a cruel attempt to lift the poor girl's short uniform skirt. The girl made no protest, her lace panties flashing for everyone to see. Bilbo gasped and shielded his virgin eyes, he looked away and his eyes fell instead on a thin boy with large glasses and freckles sniffing something out of a plastic bag.

There was a snot oozing from his left nostril when he stared at Bilbo in fright. "Hey you!" he called out to him, Bilbo involuntarily whipped around. "Why are you not wearing proper uniform?" 

Bilbo frowned and looked down at himself. He was wearing a v-neck shirt and khaki shorts and red chucks. "I-" he stuttered, the snot boy rose from his bench and padded towards him, his mop of red curly hair giving him the impression that his head was on fire.

"I am Deputy of Insufficient Cleanliness Kickers. I'm a DICK. We're responsible for properly grooming the students." he explained as the snot on his nose dripped on the floor. "Again, why are you not wearing the standard AA uniform?" he crossed his twig-like arms on his chest, looking at Bilbo like he just bombed their school. Another classroom door opened and much to Bilbo's horror, several bespectacled kids with freckles and green snots on their noses marched towards them, all stopping short behind their DICK leader like an army. As their battlecry, they snuffed their snot in unison.

"I-I'm n-not from here!" Bilbo said, backing away from the freshmen. "I'm j-just-"

The little behemoths, however, was having none of it. For the first time, they had locked on a target. 

"Boys and girls!" Commander DICK bellowed. "Bring out the cannons!"

They nodded and unison and fished a thin straw from their pockets. Bilbo, puzzled what they're about to do stupidly brought his face closer. When a boy just behind commander DICK stuffed his straw with small pieces of crumpled papers did Bilbo realized what they wanted to do.

Before the first snot bullet splattered on his cheek, he ducked and stormed further into the corridor, zigzagging his way towards the protection of the comfort room. The DICK Army chased after him, all roaring with passion as if to show their seniors how dangerous they could be. Bilbo knocked into several people but thankfully, none played a prank on him and he safely locked himself inside the empty comfort room.

He panted, backing away slowly from the door. 

Bilbo sighed in relief as he unzipped his shorts. He took a leak in peace, the sound of his wizz echoing loudly inside the room. He was zipping his shorts back when the door suddenly banged loudly which made him jump in shock. The muffled voices of the snot demons faintly audible behind the door, they were all cursing and demanding him to show himself. The door banged and with the fear of it suddenly blasting open, he retreated inside one of the cubicles and made an attempt to sit on the toilet and call for help.

The problem was, someone was already sitting on it.

Deep blue eyes, as cold as the ocean depths stared back at him before he completely lost his marbles and started to scream.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thorin and Bilbo's..not so good first impression.. err..
> 
> Also Ori and Dwalin's..well, theirs is quite embarrassing..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter! Please leave comments or kudos, thank you! And also inform me of grammar mistakes and such as english is not my first language.
> 
> Also, if you want to see the AA uniform:  
> http://s1240.photobucket.com/user/Britni_Januzys/media/School-Boy-Uniform-True-Cross-Academy-from-Blue-Exorcist.jpg.html?t=1345410496
> 
> It's from an anime Ao no Exorcist and I love their uniform. Just imagine a black vest underneath and a school seal made with something looking like..a disfigured dick..

==========================

"Holy shit, sssh! You're splitting my goddamn eardrums!"

Thorin growled, his hand clutching the intruder's stiff shoulder,shaking him hard back to sanity and his other covering his left ear. The banging outside the door, which was considered pretty normal to everyone, suddenly stopped. The little guy on his grip went quiet and blushed.

**ENTER: Thorin 'Oakenshield' Durin. Never call him Thorin Durin, it sounds ridiculous.**   
**BACKGROUND INFO: First born son of wealthy jewel magnate, Emerald and Thrain Durin. Owner of several high-end bars from all over the country. A former student of Erebor High.**   
**OFFENSE COMMITTED: Initiated a gang war inside the school premises, destroying centuries old preserved school properties.**

"I-I'm s-sorry." Bilbo said shyly, his cheeks flushing with extreme red for an unknown reason. The cubicle was tiny for two persons, his chest was roughly ground with the bigger man's. Bilbo could feel the intensity of his hard muscles and his peaked nipples rubbing against his small chest. The man had his blazer taken off, he was doned with the vest uniform and a white long-sleeved shirt rolled up to his elbows. Bilbo's gaze fell on the man's muscular arm, it's hair standing quite abruptly. "I-I'm sorry..were you _defecating_?" he asked innocently. So that explains the erected nipples and raised little hairs.

The guy merely blinked in disbelief.

Normally, he would've beaten the crap out of anyone who made fun of him but this guy, this little guy was fucking angelic when he asked the question. Silence fell between them, his large hand still cupping his tiny shoulder. His slanted, cold blue eyes met with his big, warm and bright grassy green with a tinge of sky blue orbs, just like in the picture.

"I'm sorry." Bilbo repeated for the third time, freeing himself from the man's grip. He turned his back to him and unlocked the cubicle only to find several pairs of eyes staring back at him. Good news, it was not the snot army. Bad news, it was the bunch of guys from earlier. One by one, they smirked to each other and then to Bilbo, who was fighting very hard not to melt on the spot. He activated his rare bitch mode on and squinted his eyes at them.

"What are you looking at?" his tone reeked of danger and intimidation.

_"WAAAAAAH! HOW DO I GET OUT OF HERE NOW?!" wailed inner Bilbo. \\(O.O)/ "This is all Mr. Elrond's fault that bakayero! baka! baka! baka!"_

"Girls are not allowed here." one of them grinned. He was long and lanky with sharp features and slanted, fiery eyes. His dark curls as black as starless night.

"I'm not a girl." Bilbo replied, standing up to his full height. "If you think that I'm some sort of flat-chested harridan, I'll prove to you that I'm not and I'll take you on right here, right now." he snapped furiously. Inner Bilbo though, was panicking like a chicken waiting to be slaughtered, his eyes darting to the door and to the window for an escape route.

"Oh hoho, I like this one." a muscular boy with pale skin emerged from behind the crowd, each of his footsteps echoing like battle drums. He had a completely shaved pale head with a thick scar on his defiled face. "Will you go out with me, baby carrot?" he sneered, inching his face closer to Bilbo's.

"Sure." Bilbo answered sarcastically, the monster's pale face cracked into a wide grin. "I think you could use a little bit of the sunlight."

"That's enough, Azog." tall guy with fiery eyes piped in coldly. Azog growled at him but he nevertheless retreated back to the group. "Can't you see that our baby carrot is already seeing someone?"

Picking it up as a lame cue, Thorin decided to emerge from the cubicle and shrugged casually.

"Thorin Oakenshield." Azog growled as Thorin stared back at him, their faces contorted with extreme hatred for each other. "What are you doing here?"

"This is a comfort room, Azog." he said, carelessly shoving off some members of the enemy's gang to reach out for the marble sink to wash his hands. "And when we say 'comfort'..well, you get the idea." he grinned.

"Oh, I'm sorry." tall guy said in mock sincerity. "I didn't know you're..err..quite getting comfortable with your one true love here." he leered at Bilbo who was itching to throw a witty come back but unfortunately blushed furiously instead.

"Unfortunately, Smaug." Thorin replied, thrusting his hands below the hand dryer. The machine roared to life, drowning out the sound of Bilbo's deep breaths. "My one true love remains to be myself but you're right, we're busy here and you have to show your ugly faces which up to now, I'm still confused whether it's a face or an excess arse. Take your pick." he chuckled to himself.

He received his answer in the form of a heavy blow.

But being a highly-trained MMA fighter, Thorin dodged Azog's punch and elbowed his anemic willy. Azog roared in pain, completely muffling Smaug's hurried footsteps. Thorin was ready for it nonetheless, when Smaug leaped from behind him, he grabbed his face and spun him around wildly, eventually landing on the leather couch. The other members charged and began attacking Thorin altogether while Bilbo stood there in shock, his body pressed against the cold wall. This is all too much for him.

"Go!" the guy they called Thorin bellowed at him. He was fending off another goon as he yelled for Bilbo to run. Slowly and quietly, as his knees were shaking like an undercooked gelatin, Bilbo got to his feet and bolted towards the door. His eyes flickered back to the guy uncertainly before he was met with his venomous blue eyes. Bilbo need not to be told twice, swallowing in fear, he grabbed on the handle and swung himself out of the chaos.

=============================================

 

Ori never go to dates.

He would rather spend his entire weekend chilling out under Jamba Juice's bright yellow umbrella and bask himself in the pleasant wind and warm sunlight while thick layered books were all stacked neatly in front of him, waiting to be read. Or if the weather's too harsh, he'd lock himself inside Starbucks for a whole day, drown himself in venti-sized frappuccino while sketching any thing he wanted to. Modesty aside, he could sketch everything from his imagination. Like his best friend, he was also blessed with an extraordinary gift of creative thinking which helped him navigate towards the greener side of the world. But unfortunately, again, like his best friend, their gifts only comes in handy in seasonal.

In other words, he couldn't write a goddamn romantic story.

The minute he and Lindir dropped their belongings inside their guest suite, he asked him for directions going to the library. He quickly unpacked his things, took a quick shower and left a note to Bilbo (who still hasn't return from his toilet adventure) telling him he's off to a cafe just outside the school and that he could join him if he wants.

Ori went his way towards the library. Witnessing that Arkenstone Academy's library might as well count as a cockfighting (no pun intended) event, he checked the battered books out and proceeded to the cupcake cafe outside, but not so without the dodging the pandemonium encyclopedia fight currently going on inside. He ducked in fright as thick volumes of dictionaries and almanacs flew past him, barely missing his horror-stricken face.

And that is how he was stuck here inside the pink and white-striped Sweet Dale Cafe, forcing himself to read the tragic love of Romeo and Juliet in the hopes of channeling the great poet. When the story did no good to activate his mushy-wushy side, he scowled at it and pick up another book. The cover was enough to make him puke his guts out, a man and a woman clad in nothing but in their post-coital silky blanket, staring lustfully at each other.

"What? Is a first round never enough? I don't understand these people."

Cringing to himself, he flipped the book open. Upon reading the first sentence, He resisted the passionate urge to yank all his hair from his head in secondhand embarrassment.

_"Oh, the sweetest of stars, I am certain of what I feel for you." said the boy, he took her in his hands and smiled. The smile that could melt a thousand stone cold hearts._

"What grade are you, eight grade? How do you taste stars, anyway?" Ori frowned in disgust.

_"But is this fate, my love?" the girl replied, propping herself up using her elbows. She looked at his eyes and in that instant, she knew. "How certain are we that it was indeed destiny that brought us together?"_

"Destiny, my butt. BWAHAHA!"

_He touched her in the chest, right where her heart beat in the same rhythm as his-_

"More like he wanted to grope yer tits!" Ori shrieked, his hand slamming the table loudly with great gusto. Other customers stopped their chat and watched him, frowning to themselves. But Ori did not care, he had tears of laughter in his eyes as he read the cheesy exchange between two middle-schools in love.

_"Destiny comes out of nowhere, your soul mate might be the one sitting beside you right now. That's how it works. A long time ago, the gods gave everyone a single wing each in the hopes of finding the one who matches yours and together you could soar up in the skies, fly together onward the future that awaits you._

_For all you know, he might be standing across the opposite subway station but sadly, as you finally meet each other's eyes, a train shoots through between you. Or if you're mingling amongst the crowd and you are about to bump into each other, you suddenly bent down and fixed your shoelace, missing his presence. Or he could be the one who stomped on your foot when you're caught in a stampede. Love works like that, my sweet. Everyone comes to us in either mysterious or surprising ways, some are just lucky to meet their match who surprisingly, somehow rained down from heaven."_

"Oh HAHA!" Ori bellowed in laughter, his hands gripping his stomach hard. He drummed his fist repeatedly into the table, causing scandalized looks from practically everyone inside. "HA HA HA HA destiny, my dick, like that's ever gonna happen!"

 

BLAG! BLAG! BLAG!

Ori stopped laughing as soon as he heard his books suddenly collapsing down the floor, his precious, battered babies echoing loud bellows of cries as they hit the floor with a series thunderous thuds. "Oh no!" in the process of retrieving the books, he knocked his coffee cup down. He ignored the coldness seeping through his thin trousers, he bent down to tend to the books when a large, tattooed hand accidentally touched his.

"Sorry, I knocked yer books out." a rough voice growled, tugging the book away from his grip. A figure of a large, burly man stooped down and scooped the books, loudly muttering to himself. Ori caught words such as 'klutz', 'fucker' and 'piece o' shit'. The man was scary, needless to say. Ori had the impression that he kidnaps children and puppies for pastime. From his shaved head to his right arm, he was vandalized with tattoos, he even had a piercing on his left ear. The much scary part was that he was wearing AA Uniform, or atleast, the undershirt of his uniform-the school vest and a long-sleeved shirt rolled up to his elbows, exposing his graffiti.

"Th-thanks." Ori stuttered, taking the stack from the goon's hand.

"Mind if I sit here for a while? I'm waiting for my order." he snarled more in command than a question. Wow, a vicious guy who could possibly transform as a wild lion for who knows when was actually sitting inside a cafe intended for little girls? Ori observed as the guy sat on the chair in front of him, he looked so out of place. The flowery pink chair was protesting to support his vile bottom, the circular table which was painted as a happy face looked like it's mouth has been drooped in panic. But if he had the guts to say sorry, then he shouldn't be as bad as he was supposed to look like.

**ENTER: Dwalin Durin, a distant cousin of Thorin Oakenshield.**   
**BACKGROUND INFO: the youngest son of a world-famous retired MMA fighter who began to venture into the business of putting up several dojos across the globe. A skilled fighter in hand-to-hand combat, eventually passing his knowledge to his cousin.**   
**OFFENSE COMMITTED: Expelled from repeatedly defiling the principal's office and the detention room.**

"I've read that book." Dwalin commented upon reading the cover of Ori's own book which he fished out and pretended to read to ease the awkward moment between him and the stranger. Not that he just picked up a random one from his bag, he had been spending the last few weeks bracing himself for the epic conclusion of the one he was currently reading-Harry Potter. The radio suddenly blared on, Ed Sheeran's voice wafted throughout the whole room. Ori, who wasn't sure that the man was actually talking to him, ignored him and flipped another page to continue.

 

_When your legs don't work like they used to before_   
_And I can't sweep you off of your feet_

 

"Hey I'm talking to you." Dwalin said quite in demanding tone, causing Ori to look up from his book, stunned.

"M-me?" he uncertainly pointed to himself.

 

_Will your mouth still remember the taste of my love_   
_Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks.._

"Yeah." Dwalin smirked as he raised the number card to the cafe staff, signalling for his take-out order. "It was great but somehow tragic. Fred Weasley died along with Remus and Tonks and oh- the camera boy who annoyed the shit out of Harry died too. But don't worry, Harry managed to kill Voldy with just the Expelliarmus, amazing right? And did you know that the true master of the of the Elder Wand was the Draco boy? It's hard to explain but that's how it happened."

Much to Dwalin's surprise, who was just trying to be friendly, Ori slammed Deathly Hallows loudly into the table that it almost broke in half. The table too, almost broke in half.

 

_And darling I will be loving you 'til we're seventy.._

 

"Why did you tell me?! You spoiling piece of-ugh!" blinded by anger, he chucked the tremendous hard bound book to Dwalin's direction who managed to shield his face with his fat arm.

"What?!" Dwalin indignantly snapped back. "The book ended ages ago! Don't tell me you just bought it now?!" he roared, ducking Ori's attacks who began splashing the puddle of melted coffee smoothie to his direction.

 

_And baby my heart could still fall as hard at twenty three.._

 

"That is because I'm saving every penny to buy the whole set!" Ori shot back, standing up to his full height. Dwalin got the message and stood up as well, still trying to cover his face with his arms. He dwarfed Ori so much.

 

_And I'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways.._

 

Ori began the assault and chucked all the library books one by one to Dwalin, who began running around the tables to use the customers as human shields. The customers, surprisingly, began to laugh at the prospect of a colossal man being intimidated by someone five times smaller his size. Not to mention that Dwalin holds the reputation of being the unbeatable combatant.

 

_Maybe just the touch of a hand.._

 

"Oi, I'm sorry okay? Sheesh!" Dwalin rolled his eyes in surrender, a feat that he himself was surprised to see that he could. "No need to be so teenaged-angst Harry about it!" he said across the shop as Ori threw a big dictionary, the pages flying everywhere.

 

_Oh me I fall in love with you every single day_   
_And I just wanna tell you I am.._

 

"No need to be angry?" Ori sarcastically repeated, his mouth twisting into a wolf-like snarl. "No need to be angry when I spent my entire year babysitting from kids to chimpanzees just to buy the whole set? When I remembered lunching on stale bread? If not for my best friend, I would've starved to death just to buy my books! Hyaaaaah!" he bellowed. When the books are spent, he sent a flying kick to Dwalin, unaware of who he was engaging in a brawl.

 

 

_So honey now_   
_Take me into your loving arms.._

 

"Hey, cut it out!" Dwalin yelped as soon as Ori's legs hit him on the waist. Jesus, the boy can surely kick. He bolted out of the shop before he could pay for any property damage. Of course he would be the one to pay for it, being the gentleman he really is.

 

_Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars.._

And there outside, under the light of a thousand stars, they chased each other like cats and dogs, yelling strings of colorful curses in tune with Ed Sheeran's 'Thinking Out Loud'. That is until, when both their phones began to ring at the same time. In a coincidental, the same ringtone.

"Hello?" they said in harmony, answering to their respective callers. In reflex, they shot a glare to each other as if telling them that they have no right to breathe the same word together. They had their back turned against each other and maintained a safe, long distance between them. If you call fifteen feet away a safe distance.

"Thorin?" growled Dwalin, suddenly alert.  
"Bilbo?" Ori breathed out, relief flooding through him.

"What happened?" they said again in unison, their voices still within earshot of each other. Ori began to cringe.

"What? Right now?"

 _"Ah. FUCK FUCK FUCK! This phone call somehow makes me uncomfortable! Doesn't he know any other vocabulary?"_ Dwalin asked himself in annoyance when Ori breathed out the same response to his own caller.

"I'll be right there!" Ori was beginning to get irritated now, more to the situation than to anything for some unknown reason, when the baboon he was chasing ended his own call the same way.

 

Both of them weren't sure if fate is toying with them or what. Instinctively, they turned back around and faced each other in silence. Ori was about to retort something when he closed his mouth and gaped like a fish. It was Dwalin who broke the silence first.

"Listen, I'm really sorry but I had to go. About my offense to you, well..uhrmm..meet me here tomorrow at the same time, there's something I would like to give to you. Also, here, take this. As an additional peace offering." Dwalin thrust the cafe paper bag filled with take-out cupcakes and slices into Ori's small hands. Without a word, he stormed to the opposite direction and left Ori standing there, still completely dumbfounded from the afternoon's events. Everything happened so fast.

 

_Maybe we found love right where we are.._

 

====================================================

 

"Where have you been?" Thorin cast a dark look at his cousin who just arrived, panting as if a cheetah was chasing on his tail. "Where are the cupcakes?" he growled menacingly upon seeing Dwalin's empty hands. He winced as a warm towel drenched in herbal liquid touched the surface of his skin, it burned him slightly. There were bruises all over his face from his earlier fight with Azog and Smaug.

"Out of stock." Dwalin lied skillfully, slumping himself on the leather sofa of their suite room. "They only have ones in strawberry-you hate strawberry, aye?" he smirked at Thorin whose face was suddenly contorted in revolt.

"Aye." he answered then turned to his older friend who was busily scrubbing the bruises out of his back. "Oin, I'm okay now. However, do you still have that tablet? The chocolate flavored sleeping pill?" Thorin pleaded, desperate for a long rest. They had been laboring over a paper work which is a requirement for their graduation clearance.

He opted to delve into the topic of fraternities and sororities within Arkenstone Academy and fortunately, his teachers, who were all clearly as dumb and as jackass like their students, permitted him to do so. He was currently toiling himself studying about the Queen-who first initialize the rights to form brotherhoods and sisterhoods inside the campus. The power of the Queen was absolute; she could order and command everyone from different fraternities and sororities at will. Many generations fought over the throne, to become a Queen or a King and rule. But there was a catch, in order for someone to become the King or Queen, he or she must find out who the first and currently Queen is and thwart her by making her do so.

Needless to say, Thorin had zero idea.

"Here you go, laddie." Oin handed Thorin a single piece of chewable, brown tablet.

**ENTER: Oin. Last name=unknown**   
**BACKGROUND INFO: A former pharmacist who used to work as a chemistry teacher at Erebor High. A friend of Thorin, Dwalin and Balin. He currently resides with his brother in Arkenstone Academy, continuing his chemistry teachings. Illegal drug maker as a side-line.**   
**OFFENSE COMMITTED: Selling 'suspicious' drugs to students and staff, claiming that it brings them to ecstasy in legit.**

"How's the whole thing going on?" he interrogated Thorin which meant the whole 'protect-Bilbo Baggins-thing'. Thorin scoffed and laid back on the sofa lazily, his hands under his head.

"Oh, don't make it sound like I would be the only one involved." he laughed. "We're all in this together. I already met him this afternoon, that's how I got this thing here." he replied, pointing at the black eye on his left side.

"What a drat!" Dwalin commented, slamming his palms loudly on the leather. "Don't tell me he was the one who did that to you?" he howled with laughter, forgetting that he was also violated by a shrimp just a while ago.

"No, you prick." Thorin shot back, frowning. "One of Smaug's shitty minions did this. I was yelling for the midget to run away, poor thing's been attacked within his first ten minutes here." he shook his head in defeat, his bruise throbbing slightly as he did so.

"Why?" Oin asked, his ridiculous ear-trumpet on his left ear as he listened. "Are they recruiting him into that stink hole gang of theirs?"

Thorin laughed bitterly. "Nah. You wouldn't believe this but they're kinda attracted to the little thing."

Then Thorin drifted away on his own, his thoughts sailing back to Bilbo Baggins. Gandalf was wrong, he was not quite small, he's undeniably tiny. Thorin reckoned that Bilbo's body just measured half of him, Bilbo's height just leveling with his biceps. Surely, it would be such a drag to protect him. Considering how light he is, he would be the constant target for gangs who knew nothing but bully those who they are able to carry.

Ah, Bilbo. The sweet, not so innocent Bilbo. The photos were not lying, the kid exactly looked like a larger sized ball-jointed doll with his delicate features.

"Earth to Thorin, yoohoo." a voice interrupted his thoughts, an annoying voice which can only belong to Bofur. He pried his eyes open, only to see the rest of Durin Ten sitting on the floor like pre-schools waiting for their teacher to read them a story. "I believe you called for a meeting, wait for me while I get some cheese knife." he brightly said in his Northern Irish accent.

**ENTER: Bofur, Lastname=unknown**   
**BACKGROUND INFO: From Ireland, a former student in Blue Mountain University famous for his reputation as 'class clown'. The first born of well-known toy makers with various chains of stores from all around the world which caters high-quality toys only intended for people who can shell out money.**   
**OFFENSE COMMITTED: Accidentally brought a newly crafted sex toy as a present to his homeroom teacher. Sadly, the said teacher fainted and was comatose for three months.**

 

====================================================

 

Bilbo was getting ready for the day when someone knocked on their door. He put on his bathrobe and twisted the towel on top of his dripping wet hair and padded over to the white door. Lindir entered himself after a polite greeting, on his hands were several pieces of folded black garments.

"What's that?" Bilbo asked, sitting on his bed cross-legged as he ruffled his wet hair with the towel.

"Your uniforms." Lindir answered politely before laying each necessary piece on his and Ori's respective beds. "While you contestants remain to be our very important guests, you are still required to wear the standard uniform."

"Ah. So this is it." Bilbo breathed out quite excitedly, the prospect of wearing a different uniform thrilled him enough to momentarily forget that he would be eventually carrying Arkenstone Academy's disfigured dick crest as well. "You know, a bunch of DICK's attacked me yesterday for not wearing one." he told Lindir as he bent to pick up the black blazer made with very fine, velvety cloth.

"Well, they're quite..enthusiastic sometimes." Lindir agreed, now wheeling in a breakfast tray for them. "I take it you prefer tea instead of coffee?"

"Oh thanks, Lindir! We can do it ourselves. Have you eaten? Come and join us." Bilbo said cheerily without looking at their butler, who, unbeknownst to him, was blushing in deep red. He was still busily examining the very gorgeous silk red and white tie which flowed through his hands like smooth water. "Red? I've seen others wearing blue?" Bilbo wondered loudly, his memories drifting back to the gang who assaulted him yesterday inside the comfort room.

"Red tie is for guests, Master Baggins." Lindir replied, it was Bilbo's turn now to blush just like his tie's color. "Green is for freshmen, yellow for sophomores, violet for juniors and dark blue for seniors."

Bilbo coughed. "Ehrmm, sorry..what?" he said in confusion, sipping his tea. Lindir stopped abruptly, his perfectly shaved brows furrowed in confusion when an idea struck him just by looking at Bilbo and his tea, along with his accent.

"Oh, I apologize! I was told that British never really uses those terms. I'm sorry." Lindir chuckled in embarrassment. "Anyway, green ties for first years. Yellow ones for second years and violet and dark blue for those who are in final years."

Bilbo smiled widely, scratching his head. "Hehe. Sorry, I'm from Britain."

The bathroom door opened and Ori, who, to Bilbo's wondering, was utterly clouded in a bad mood since yesterday. Lindir excused himself and left the breakfast cart by the table.

"Ori, what in the name of Yavanna's tubers is wrong with you?" Bilbo frowned, making his way to the cart. Ori did not answer and slammed the bathroom door instead. "You can tell me if anything's wrong, you know because in case you've forgotten, we're BFFs ever since the world began." he snapped in annoyance, chewing on a chocolate biscuit.

"What is our schedule for today?" Ori grumbled, picking up his own AA uniform.

"We have a meeting with Mr. White today, he's the assigned coach for all of us contestants. Don't worry, he's from the government so no biases will happen. Then after lunch is free time." Bilbo remarked, starting on a ham sandwich this time. Ori just nodded and joined him on the table.

"Really, what's wrong with you?"

Ori took a deep breath before answering. "I met someone yesterday. And I'm supposed to meet with him this afternoon."

"Oh. And..?" Bilbo quizzed, his eyebrow rising.

"And what?" Ori snapped, pancake syrup dripping from his mouth.

"Is it a date?"

"A date-?! What?" Ori coughed for a minute straight before Bilbo had to pour a glass of water for him. "Goodness, Bilbo. No! The gorilla spoiled Harry Potter for me then I got so angry. As a compensation, he said he'd give me something." Ori explained, eyeing the white refrigerator by the kitchen. Inside it was the cupcakes the tattooed Hulk gave him last night.

"So why are you so angry?" Bilbo inquired, stuffing his mouth with raspberry jam.

"Because I had no book left to read!" Ori wailed indignantly. "Everything's spoiled for me, thank you very much!"

"I thought you visited the library." Bilbo argued persistently, anything just to ease his best friend's fury that he hadn't seen for ten years now. "If this place is big enough then you could imagine how big their hall of knowledge would be." Bilbo said sympathetically.

"Bilbo, that place gives a whole new meaning to 'facebook'." Ori waived his grape jam smeared hands impatiently, occasionally spluttering Bilbo's face with some. "I choose to remain alive from this day until I take my last breath here on earth."

"So what do you want us to do?"

"Please come with me. He's really scary and he looks like he belongs to a frat."

 

Great. Another gangsters-wannabe. Bilbo was surely sick of their ugly faces but for Ori, he really didn't have no other choice but to agree.

 

=============================================

 

"The fuck are you doing, you ogre?"

Thorin thundered upon seeing his and Dwalin's room flooded with books. He froze in surprise by the doorway, his questioning eyes scanning the room for his cousin who apparently, was already buried alive beneath the books.

"Practicing for the swim meet." Dwalin replied sarcastically. To add to Thorin's annoyance, he paddled his arms and legs and pretended to do a breaststroke on the books. Thorin rolled his eyes in irritation, getting real tired of his cousin's shit. "Nah, I'm just looking for reading material."

"I didn't know you loved to read." Thorin teased, giving his cousin a wicked grin. He gestured at the tall shelf filled with nothing but books from Dwalin's mom who made him bring all of it in the hopes of triggering a more peaceful hobby for her son. But as far as Dwalin is concerned, reading is for pussies who prefers to have an intense eye-sex with papers.

"Shut up and help me." the tattooed man grumbled. Thorin shrugged and stared at his cousin who was gritting his teeth in madness, struggling to read each cover which is written in cursive forms. Love stories. He didn't know what is going on with his cousin but despite leading the announcement of unnecessary jokes along with Bofur last night, Dwalin was clearly having a not so pleasant mood. Eventually falling into a sour expression as soon as laughter dies out.

 

"You know that you're the one who saved me from being an emo, right?" Thorin started at his cousin as they fish out any romantically titled book. "Remember, years ago?"

"Sod off, cocksucker. I know you wanted to ask me something." Dwalin mumbled angrily into which Thorin only laughed. He was so used to everything his cousin does, so used to whatever his cousin says that the word 'offended' was nothing to them anymore.

"True." Thorin replied, brushing his braids out of his sight. "I just wanted to know what's going on with you since last night."

 

No secrets. That was what Durin's Ten pact is. They all believed that the secret for binding them stronger is to speak out your mind and your heart, and that is where 'A willing heart' comes in.

 

"I had a run-in with a midget bookworm yesterday. Spoiled the fuck out of his story, he turned into a Dark Lord and started to bombard me with thick dictionaries and shit. I think I got hit once, he kicked me and I'm telling you, son. the dwarf can shove a double dildo up my ass without fear."

Within the next five minutes, Thorin was howling with uncontrolled laughter, his ponytail coming loose as he sprawled himself on the floor, twisting and writing in extreme mirth. Hmm.. not a good example to show as a brotherhood leader.

"Holy shit.." he wheezed as he tried to wipe the happy tears on his eyes. "I'd like to meet this soul mate of yours, Dwalin."

"Good." Dwalin hissed in exasperation amidst Thorin's continued manly shrieking. "Because you're coming with me."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THE FACE OFF *cue Nazgul's theme *
> 
> Four people claiming that it was not a date but ended up having a date, anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahō= Japanese term for 'idiot' dumb, stupid and is more common in the Kansai (Osaka) area of Japan.
> 
> For those who wanted to listen to our Ahō bird: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjEC_DGF4wU
> 
> I'm really sorry for my grammar mistakes ;w;

 Bilbo checked his watch, it was now four thirty n the afternoon and according to Ori, he met the mysterious guy yesterday at about five fifteen. They decided to go earlier, having no way to contact the other party. Heck, Ori didn't even know the name of the guy. So at four thirty-five, they put on their blazers and bicycled the driveway, surrendering their bikes at the front gate to travel on foot towards the nearby Sweet Dale Cafe.

The afternoon sun added to the pleasant ambiance, the golden orange glow of the rays illuminating the grass. Bilbo had the urge to lie down on it and just spend the remaining afternoon in peace while strumming a guitar. If he was not mistaken, they were currently walking on a park. There were several benches scattered neatly throughout the entire square, the asphalt is made up of smooth pebbles, which is surprisingly pleasant even if you walk barefooted. There was a long piece of waist-high wall on the right side, a number of couples sat on top of it, overlooking the ocean.

The wall was cut in half, a stair leading down the shore was placed in between of them. Again, Bilbo had the strong urge to ditch his best friend and dip his feet on the salt water. But instead, they kept walking. Bilbo glanced at Ori who was also longing to run along the beach as they had no nothing like this back in the Shire. This place is not bad, after all.

"Do you think it's also best to go here at night?" Ori asked after a moment, into which Bilbo clearly understood what he meant. He smiled excitedly.

"You bet." he smiled widely, spreading his arms wide to welcome the fresh air hitting his face. Bilbo looked back and stared at the Arkenstone Academy standing proudly at the distance. He found it ironic to see a piece of paradise amidst hell. A good distance away, cars were honking impatiently, eager to arrive home from their works. It's so strange to hold three different dimensions in one place. There was the school, the hell. This beautiful park, the heaven. And the financial district at the distance, the purgatory.

"We're here." Ori announced, stopping in front of a shop which resembled the witch's bread house from Hansel and Gretel. It was beautiful and cute that Bilbo hardly believed it that Ori met a monster inside the cafe. His eyes landed on the giant menu by the window, he drooled. An all-you-can-eat cakes and coffee, wow! And for such a reasonable price!

"Come on, Ori! My treat!" Bilbo said brightly, taking his best friend by the arm.

"Err, Bilbo.. I-I'm not sure if I'm still welcome in t-that place." Ori said uncertainly, giving it a sour look. Bilbo was having none of it.

"And why not?" he challenged his friend, his hands on his hips. Ori was about two answer when two giant figures loomed above them, their shadows clearly evident against the setting sun.

"Because he total wrecked the place yesterday." answered a rough, arrogant voice. The best friends swallowed in nervousness, their throat suddenly gone dry. Slowly and fearfully, they whipped around in unison only to find two titans standing in front of them. Ori had no reason to gasp in surprise, but he still did. Bilbo, on the other hand, who had all the rights for a sharp intake of breath turned pale and speechless.

Thorin Oakenshield was staring back at him.

=========================================

 

And then there was silence.

 

Broken only by the flock of birds passing through the afternoon sky. "Ahou..Ahou..Ahou...Ahouka.." they squawked.

 

 

 

"U-uh, he-hello.." Ori began awkwardly, waiving uncertainly at the man standing beside Thorin. "W-we're here.." he grinned nervously. Dwalin raised his eyebrows at Ori, as if considering that this was not the person he bumped to yesterday.

"Hi." Dwalin greeted back, handing Ori the heavy paper bag filled with...books. "I ravaged through my shelf, I'm sorry if this would not suffice." he grunted apologetically, looking anywhere but Ori. The latter took it, who did not bother looking at the titles.  
   
"Th-thank you." he stuttered, grabbing Bilbo's arm and squeezing it with pressure that Bilbo's fingers purpled at the ends. "S-sorry about..about yesterday." Ori continued, almost hiding his behind Bilbo in deep shame. To their surprise, Dwalin chuckled. Chuckled. Not howl with mirth.

"Where's the miniature monster I talked to yesterday?" he grinned. "I'm Dwalin, by the way." he extended his large tattooed hand to Ori who took it with his trembling hand.

"O-ori.." he muttered. Bilbo watched as Dwalin's humongous hand wrapped around Ori's minuscule one. Thorin cleared his throat importantly, Ori was the first to let go.

"Hi there, Bilbo." Thorin said quite loudly enough for everyone to hear. Bilbo did not wonder how Thorin learned of his name. They are representatives from other school, the news of their identities must've spread by now. Bilbo said nothing as he couldn't find the right words to reply with. Instead, he took this chance to further study Thorin Oakenshield. His face was splattered with bruises from yesterday's restroom brawl, there was an evident black eye on the left side of his face. Suddenly, Bilbo felt guilty. The guy just literally caught all the abuse in his stead.

Nevertheless, he was still dashingly gorgeous. How Thorin managed it, he did not know. Bilbo quite liked his salt and pepper mane tied into a neat ponytail, a lock of braided hair framed the right side of his face. Oh now that was weird. His beard was a plus too. Bilbo knew from the start that Thorin's age is too late to be in high school, instead of looking like a skinny hobo, his beard perfectly matched the maturity of his face. And oh em gee, he was even an inch taller than Dwalin! Then Bilbo's eyes dropped on his, he felt an unexplained surge of energy when his bright and warm eyes met with Thorin's cold ones.

He went down to scan his prominent nose. Woot, noses like that could impale a person. Then before Bilbo started daydreaming about his lips, he stomped himself on the foot painfully. Twice.

"Uh..err..?" came Thorin's concerned voice, waiving his gigantic bandaged hand in front of Bilbo's eyes. "You alright?" he asked.

"Uhm..y-yeah! S-sorry. I-I was just. you know..worried about.. t-the c-contest." he stammered, fidgeting uncomfortably on his spot. Thorin chuckled uncertainly.

"Relax, you still have a month to prepare." Thorin beamed, his pearly whites flashing at Bilbo who managed to smile back. "Look at your friend, he's having a good time."

And that was when Bilbo realized that Ori and Dwalin already vanished in front of him. To his astonishment, Thorin put his hands on his shoulders and spun him around to point at Dwalin and his friend inside Sweet Dale Cafe, settling on the most secluded table possible.

"Not welcome, my ass." Bilbo muttered indignantly in which Thorin perfectly heard, earning him a rhythmic laughter from the raven-haired man. "Do you want to join them? Or perhaps get a table inside?" Thorin simply asked.

Bilbo shook his head and stuck out his tongue in mock disgust. "No, thanks. I don't think I still got my appetite after seeing the two of them together." Thorin guffawed at this, followed by Bilbo who just realized that he made a not so lame joke after a long time.

"Wanna come with me to the park? I've been dying to enjoy the nighttime seaside air." Thorin inquired casually, fingering his braided lock.

Oh no. Oh no.Oh no. Oh what?! Is he asking for a date?! A FUUUUCKINNGGGGG DAAATE! He, Thorin Oakenshield, one of Arkenstone Academy's most gorgeous, if not the most gorgeous lad going to date him, Bilbo Baggins of Hobbiton High who is a complete nerd and almost got hit by a snot-ball?!

"I-I..I am...I-...Bilbo twitched awkwardly, waving both of his hands in front of him. "I mean, it's j-just..I-"

_Oh goddamn!_

"Are you scared of me?" Thorin frowned, letting go of his shoulders and putting his hands back inside his pockets. Like Bilbo, he was still wearing his school uniform minus the blazer. And Bilbo started to picture him wearing it handsomely.

"Oh no! No!" Bilbo gave a nervous laughter. "I-It's just..what if we, err..we got caught b-by your g-girlfriend or something.." he stuttered. To his amazement, Thorin barked a laughter, Bilbo blushed in crimson.

"I can't even get you to come with me, what makes you think I can approach girls?" he teased in between manly giggles. "Come on, I won't take 'no' for an answer." without a word, he took Bilbo by the hand and led the way back to the heavenly park he and Ori passed by earlier. But Bilbo, as excited he was, cannot concentrate on his surroundings. His eyes kept darting to his and Thorin's hand, currently entwined with each other.

So this is how you hold hands with a person. Is the nerve-tingling sensation normal?

"Hey, wait here." Thorin exclaimed after a long walk in silence. He untangled himself from Bilbo's grip and rushed towards the central part of the park where booths of different kinds were erected, their neon signs glowing brightly to attract customers. Bilbo cannot help but smile to himself as he sat down on a park bench situated between two bushes. Is this real? Is this right? Everything seems so alien to him as if he was suddenly transported to a whole new dimension where his fears and doubts suddenly dissolved into thin air.

Bilbo let himself adjust to his surroundings. The breathtaking scene before him helped ease the slightly rapid beating of his heart, he put his hands behind his head and allowed himself to enjoy the fresh, nocturnal wind idly swaying the plants and the flowers beside him.

"I wonder what Ori's doing right now?" he whispered to himself before closing his eyes to savor the peaceful moment.

=============================================

 

"I'm really, really sorry, Dwalin." Ori atoned for the nth time, not meeting his date's eyes. "I guess I was just as bit..carried away." he scratched his head in apology. They were currently seated on a rather private corner of the shop. Thankfully, Sir Bard, the middle-aged man owner of the cafe was forgiving enough to allow him regain his access back to the shop. He also reported that by happy chance, they need not to pay anything as there were no damages at all.

_"Yeah, except my pride."_

"Pssssh." Dwalin waived him away impatiently before draining his root beer mug. "It was my fault anyway, that's why I gave you tonfucks of books to read. I hope you like them." he grinned at the smaller man. The funny thing is, if this would have been yesterday, they won't stop at nothing just to point their blame at each other but right now, it's as seems the both of them carried the heavy, nagging guilt for hurting each other recklessly within themselves.

"No, no! You have to understand!" the auburn haired little man exclaimed, his eyes widening in exaggeration. "I don't want you to think of me as a fire-breathing dragon!"

Dwalin laughed heartily upon the remark. "You sure are like one yesterday. But okay, whatever the reason is, I'd like to understand. If that is fine with you, of course." he smiled and silently gave himself a high-five. That was the longest sentence he uttered without squeezing a disgusting swear word or two. In fact, he was amazingly surprised at himself that he was capable of talking normally. And formally.

Ori swallowed nervously, his face cracking into a dubious smile. Somehow, he finds it easy to pour out his inner self to this man. He had always been fond of meeting people who act opposite their physical appearance. The phrase 'First impression lasts' does not work on him that is why it is quite silly to think how he just tried to kill the man yesterday and ended up pouring out his life story to him about twenty four hours later. That was the most amusing emotional transition ever.

"Books to me are like companies to you." he began to explain, twirling the plastic straw of his iced tea using his fingers. "I was not joking when I said that I work ridiculously hard just to earn myself money."

Dwalin nodded. "But what about your parents? Siblings? Surely they will be able to lend you some money for your hobby?"

"That's why I said books to me are companies to you rich people. I had no one. Literally no one. I lived in a foster home and I'm adopted, having lost my biological family to an accident when I was young. I'm working hard because I had no one to turn to. No one would give me presents and believe me when I tell you that being adopted into a foster family isn't always fresh cookies and warm bath." Ori chuckled bitterly before smiling at the thought."That is why everything I buy with my hard earned money is considered an investment for myself."

For the first time, Dwalin looked. Really looked at the boy sitting in front of him. In all his life, he had never experienced working hard for something in order to get it. Why? Everything he wanted was spoon-fed to him. When he was a little boy, all he needed to do was point and voila! The expensive, superb racing car toy model which many kids drool at enviously would be tightly clenched inside his stubby arms. He had never labored for anything, he never cared about the amount of money he shelled out. Hell, he even remembered using a crisp thousand pound note as a tissue paper when he unexpectedly shat on the road.

So why was his heart suddenly cracking little by little like an ancient porcelain vase? Why does his chest felt suddenly heavy upon seeing the happy smile on Ori's face as if nothing was wrong?

"Where do you live now?" was what came out of Dwalin's mouth, his voice hoarse.

"I live alone." Ori answered, before sipping his tea jovially. "A kind teacher took me in until he had to retire, his children took him and they left the country. The small cottage was left to my care and I've been doing several home-based jobs to support myself."

"Everything in my foster home was not fine. I was actually treated like Cinderella." he laughed, shaking his head at the honey-glazed doughnut in front of him. "The first birthday present I received was from Bilbo in kindergarten, he was just my seatmate back then. You know what he gave me? A box of crayons. _Jus_ t the box, nothing inside. Sneaky git."

"B-but you're family." Dwalin pressed on, trying to shed some light. "The real one, they might be alive for all you know."

"Nah, I'm not holding on to hope." mumbled Ori, playing with the straw again. "I couldn't really remember anything. I remembered having two older brothers though but that was it, I don't recall anyone's name but mine."

Dwalin wanted to punch something, anything. Tons of questions boiling inside him. Why do people who does not deserve to be unhappy always become the victim? How do they manage to crack a smile even after all they've been through?

Suddenly, Ori was someone. It's as seem that a light rained down from the heaven, allowing him to look at Ori differently. For Dwalin, he was no longer the monster who tried to cut his life short by hauling books at his face. Ori was a brave, brave person. A person who clung to hope even if he's left with nothing to hold on to.

 

A light flickered from the distance.

One switch to light them all. The glowing light spread like a spider weaving it's web, eventually illuminating a large Ferris wheel in bright colors of red, yellow and purple. One by one, neon lights bearing carnival ride names started to flicker as well. Dwalin and Ori watched as the carnival came to life as the night draws on.

"You wanna go?" Dwalin raised an eyebrow. He had never set foot to such a place ever since he graduated from middle-school, but it can't hurt to indulge once more, can it?

"Hell, yeah!" Ori blurted out excitedly, stuffing his doughnut full in his mouth. "Let's go!"

Right. It won't hurt to indulge once more. Especially if it meant helping a person feel better. Even just for a bit.

================================================

 

The next thing Bilbo felt was a cold sensation hitting his lips violently.

"Uhmph!" he jolted, tasting chocolate in the process.

"Oh, shit! I'm sorry Bilbo!" bellowed Thorin's raspy voice in panic. Bilbo opened his eyes and was unexpectedly met with the most adorable scenery he ever laid eyes upon.

Thorin was standing in front of him, two cones of ice cream in each hand, one vanilla topped with cherry and one chocolate sprinkled with chopped nuts. And surprise! Surprise! He was wearing a panda hat on his head, tow furry strings framing his masculine face.

"What the-pfffft. Hahaha!" Bilbo began to laugh, chocolate ice cream still splattered around his lips resembling Thorin's beard.

"What's funny?" said Thorin darkly. The ice cream was beginning to melt in his hands so he urged Bilbo to take the chocolate-flavored one, almost shoving it on his lips once more. "Here, I bought this for you and then you laugh at me." he sulked and sat next to Bilbo, maintaining a distance as if to say _'Hmmph! I'm mad at you! Fuck off!_

Bilbo fished a white hanky from his pocket and wiped the sticky substance from his mouth, contenting himself with a large grin. They sat in silence for a while, licking their ice creams while watching the rambunctious kids running along the top of the beach wall. Bilbo took advantage of this quiet moment and relaxed. To his of surprise, he felt a rush of positivity flow inside of him. It was like the feeling of standing on top of the world or in simpler means, it felt like the unbreakable thrill when you get the highest score in a test, it was twirling inside like a supernova. He felt so...free.

"You look so happy, master Baggins." Thorin commented icily, still not looking at him. Bilbo would've agreed to himself that angry!Thorin is quite scary, that is, if not for the little panda perched on top of him. "Or did you just forget that you have a companion?"

"Awww, Thorin please don't be mad." Bilbo cooed, without thinking, he closed the gap between them and laid his head on Thorin's shoulder.

_"Bilbo! What the fuck are you doing?!"_ Inner Bilbo yelled in shock. _"He might be a serial killer for all you know!"_

"Hmph!" the bigger man answered, still looking away from him, determined to get Bilbo to his knees. But Thorin only looked away just to hide the small smile blossoming on his lips. He had never met someone so open before that it triggered a sense of longing inside of him. What? For a friend? No, he had Durin Ten for that and each time spent with them is when he's happiest. They had always spent their bonding time plotting for Smaug or Azog's murder that always included hilariously violent tactics like hooking a fish hook on their butt holes, make them eat ice pop made of dish washing detergent, push them on a pee-filled swimming pool, ice skate over their ugly faces, snap their nipples using a scissor, shove cow pies on their face..

Really, they could make a whole new edition of Saw movie just from their ideas.

"Hehe, you're smiling!" Bilbo said, suddenly snapping him back to present. To add to his annoyance, the idiot began poking his cheek repeatedly. "Do that more often, you'll look perfect for a toothpaste ad." he grinned.

"Sod off." Thorin growled, unable to hide a faint blush on his cheeks."Don't make me throw you in the water." he whispered menacingly, catching Bilbo's finger.

_"What did I tell you?!"_ wailed Inner Bilbo.

"I'm hungry, let's eat." Bilbo stood and stretched, untucking the shirt inside his vest in the process. "Come on, you big lump."

"Don't call me that or I'll really hurl your tiny body into the ocean and you can swim yourself back to Shire."

"Good." Bilbo countered, grabbing Thorin's hand and tugged him to stand. The man didn't even budge, his butt just lazily plopped on the wooden bench. "That'll save me from spending subway fare."

"Oh, Jesus. I can't believe you." Thorin laughed, shaking his head. "You're unbelievable."

"My willpower to make you stand up despite of your fat muscles is what's unbelievable." Bilbo snapped, unable to contain the growling of his stomach. Never ever underestimate a Baggins's appetite.

,

"Okay, okay. For fuck's sake." Thorin muttered defeated.

"Language, Thorin!" Bilbo reprimanded sternly, waving a warning finger in front of Thorin's blue eyes.

"Yes, _mum_. Come on, where would you like to eat?" he obliged. Bilbo looped his arm with Thorin's as they walked along the park in the hopes of finding a good place to have dinner. While Thorin wanted to drive Bilbo downtown to a fancy five-star restaurant, Bilbo wanted nothing but commoner food. He began jumping up and down maniacally, pointing at a hot dog booth from the distance.

"I like this!" he beamed, standing in front of the stand. "You should try some, too!"

"Err..?" Thorin hesitated, his nose scrunching in uncertainty as he watched the hot dogs spinning on a machine filled with greasy oil. Then his gaze fell on a batch of french fries being deep fried mercilessly using a recycled cooking oil. The french fries stared at him, screaming for help. "I'm not sure this is a good..idea?" he muttered to Bilbo, thinking about the food downtown where everything is handled safe and sanitized. Where hot dogs are steamed not deep fried on a high-fat oil.

"Oh. Psssh. Piss off, rich brat." Bilbo waived him away undauntedly, taking a menu from the obviously affronted teen who was manning the stand. "Go on, take a pick and the bill's mine." he said, without even sparing Thorin a glance. For a moment, Thorin wished he was a random hot dog stand menu.

"Alright." he swallowed nervously and began calculating the amount of time he would spend on the treadmill just by taking the first bite of his food. He was too scared of eating junk for the first time that he did not contradict Bilbo taking care of the bill. "T-the fish and chips..sounds..okayish." he said, pointing at a large box filled with twister fries and balls of filleted fish. Okayish? What kind of language was that? He could hear Dwalin's cruel laughter on the back of his mind. What was happening to him?

"Okay. I'll have a bacon-wrapped hot dog on a bun and my friend here would like to have the fish and chips. And add two chocolate smoothies." Bilbo smiled at the teen, handing him a bill. "Let's go." he turned to Thorin, taking his hand and lead him to a nearby kiosk.

 

After dinner, Bilbo mentioned that he wanted to visit the carnival.

The decision was spontaneous, as soon as the curly-haired boy saw the Ferris wheel joyfully spinning around, he forgot his half-eaten sandwich and began pumping his tiny fist into the air. Suddenly bursting out a story when he was a young kid and his parents would take him on a ride and then he would always have a tantrum whenever their gondola would stop at the topmost part of the circle.

Thorin envisioned a young, chubby Bilbo with overstuffed cheeks crying at the top of his lungs as their pod dangled three hundred feet high from the ground.

"I was always afraid of heights. I mean, until now." he confessed. "When the wheel would rotate halfway, that's alright, I would even pretend to fly like Superman, back then. But when it would stop at the highest point, that's no longer funny. I'm literally shaking and whimpering so wildly that our pod would always threaten to snap off from the hinges." he grinned widely upon reminiscing.

"That's no surprise." Thorin commented, chewing a fry while laughing. "Considering how short you are. I mean, until now." he imitated Bilbo's tone as he said the same words which earned him a glare from his date.

"Oh, shut up, you lump." Bilbo snapped and pointed his plastic knife to Thorin. "Let's see who would chicken out when we ride that thing." he sneered.

"I'm not the one who's Wheelphobic." Thorin shot back. Ugh, there goes the random rabble drabble again.

"You're on, lump. Let's go." Bilbo wiped his face with a greasy napkin and got up from their table. Thorin stared at him and reverted his gaze back at his snack box sadly, the thing was surprisingly full of flavor. He took a last sip from his smoothie and followed an impatient Bilbo.

================================

Bilbo's heart was pounding loudly. Without being so obvious, he sat too close to Thorin, who was sitting nonchalantly, inside their pod. His heart started to hammer loudly inside his chest, cold drops of sweat streaming down his face, as the bell rang signalling for the operator to activate the ride. Bilbo was serious when he challenged Thorin that he would overcome his fear by riding a ferris wheel and Thorin took his word. But there was one thing the latter did not mention.

The pods were fucking open-air. Windowless. Not to mention, it was four hundred feet high.

 

Ahou. Ahou. Ahou. Ahouka..

"Whoa, take it easy." Thorin said as the ride started to move slowly. Bilbo inched closer to him, wiping the sweat off his forehead, trying to sit upright. His knees began to wobble, his stomach swirling in sensations. "Take it easy, take it easy." Thorin repeated like a mantra.

The wheel began to move halfway upward and at an instant, Bilbo's view of the carnival was shifted with a view of the darkening sky. He risked a small peek on the windowless rim and almost fainted in fear, the land below was like nothing but a small toy town! He slumped back on the seat, refusing to pry his eyes open until they get their feet back on the ground.

"Relax..relax...this is nothing, just nothing.." Thorin was muttering again and again, his arm still on the rim behind Bilbo. How he could be so nonchalant about being suspended in mid air?!

"I'm relaxing.. I-i'm..you d-didn't say it was o-open!" Bilbo shot back shakily.

"Relax..relax...this is nothing, just nothing.." was what Thorin's reply again. Bilbo, sensing that something was off, bravely fluttered his eyes open and looked at Thorin. And to his surprise, the bigger man was sweating uncontrollably, his eyes shut very tight as he whispered his survival mantra. "Relax..relax...this is nothing, just nothing.." he prayed earnestly. Despite his fear, Bilbo let out a weak bark of laughter, stirring Thorin out of his meditation.

"What?" he snapped back to Bilbo with panic in his usually cold eyes. "I didn't know it was open, either!"

"You dumb fish butt!" Bilbo yelled as the wind started to howl stronger, indicating that they were soon about to stop for ten minutes at the highest point of the ride. "You'll kill us both!"

"Atleast we die together, it was nice meeting you." Thorin took his shaking arm off the rim and grasped Bilbo's sweating hand. "And Bilbo?"

"Y-yeah?"

"Did I mention I was afraid of heights too?"

 

"WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!"

"FUCK THE WOOOOORLLLDDDD! SUCK MY DIIICCCCKKK!!!!" they hugged each other tightly while they screamed in unison as the pod escalated upwards to settle itself at the peak.

 

============================

Meanwhile..

 

"Dwalin!" Ori gasped and withdrew his head currently leaning on Dwalin's broad chest. He craned his neck from his left to right as soon as he heard the strange sound. "There is a fell voice in the air!" he wheezed, keeping an ear out for what seemed to him as two people screaming their guts out.

"Nah, ignore it." Dwalin grunted, cupping Ori at the back of his head and leaning him back down on his chest again. "People chickenin' out on a ferris wheel, what a shame." he shook his head and tightened his grip on Ori as their pod plummeted down gently.

"You're right." Ori laughed heartily as he listened to Dwalin's abnormally fast heart beat. _"Hah! He must be afraid too, that lying cocksucker!"_

============================

"Fuck, now my clothes are soaked!" Thorin laughed as he watched Bilbo descend the wooden stairs exiting Log Splash, a wet ride involving sitting inside something resembling a log as it cascade down a steep, watery slope.

"You're not the only one, wise guy. Hold on, I think I'm gonna be sick." Bilbo said before leaning down the rail to puke.

"Bilbo?" Thorin stepped closer, suddenly concerned. "Are you okay? I should get you- Aaaaah!" he yelled in shock and disgust as a green, slimy toy was chucked at his front. "Bilbo, that's not funny!"

"HAHAHA!" Bilbo roared with laughter, picking up his toy vomit from the ground.

"Where did you get that?!" Thorin thundered, his majestic blue orbs wide in revolt.

"I won it as a prize." he explained, taking Thorin's hand towards another sick-causing ride.

===============================

 

They went back to Arkenstone Academy at exactly eleven thirty in the evening, riding Thorin's black Ducati. The guard on duty glared at them furiously before locking the gates for the night.

"Guards here can detect who's out and who's not." Thorin clarified, maneuvering his bike towards the driveway. It was so dark and quiet, the only sounds being the roaring engines of Thorin's Ducati and the loud howling of the night wind. The school lights are out except for the dimmers at the lobby where a front desk officer was dozing off, his head lolling idly like Nearly Headless Nick.

"I'll walk you to your room, where is it?" Thorin said gently as he dismounted, turning the ignition off.

"Room 201, East Wing. Thorin, you don't have to. I'll see you in the morning." Bilbo, however, wished he hadn't said that. He would see Thorin in the morning for what, exactly? In shame, he bent his head down and started to walk away when Thorin grabbed his arm rather fiercely.

"No, no. I insist. Come on." he pressed on, tugging Bilbo's arm.

Bilbo just wanted to lie down and rest, and perhaps sort out his disarrayed thoughts. He just wanted to disappear from Thorin's sight. "Thorin-" he forced, taking his arm away from the latter's grip. But perhaps he shouldn't test his patience. Without a word, he scooped him up with the slightest effort and carried him, bridal style, towards the East Wing.

"Oh-Thorin!" Bilbo breathed out, struggling to free himself. He writhed, twisted and kicked but Thorin kept his firm grip on him. Thankfully, the halls were vacated and no single soul was in sight.

"Stay still, unless you want me to resort to something much better." he smirked. Bilbo blushed beet red as he realized how close Thorin's face was to his, he could feel the warmth of his breath on his jaw. They, or rather, Thorin walked in silence. His footsteps echoing on the quiet ground and Bilbo feared that someone might see them like that.

"We're here." Thorin announced after a while. He stopped short in front of a double oak door and let Bilbo down. "Oak wood, nice." he grinned, caressing the door lovingly before turning his gaze to Bilbo who began to fidget uncomfortably. This is it..

Somehow, a swirl of different emotions burst inside of him. Several, unknown feelings that are very difficult to put a name to. His chest constricted slightly as if he was anticipating for something to happen..But what was it?

"I had a nice time, Bilbo." Thorin whispered after a long time of silent brooding in front of the oak door. "Thanks for your time."

Bilbo nodded, not meeting his eyes. "Right. I had a nice time too. Thank you." he tried to smile at him but it ended up as a wince instead. In the movies, whenever things like this happens, two people ended up kissing each other goodnight or stuttering stupidly as they ask the other for a second date. But neither happened. He risked a glance at Thorin, who was swallowing with discomfort, his eyes still locked on the door, unblinking.

A light flickered inside, followed by footsteps nearing the door. Ori was home. The noise was enough to startle Thorin from his trance , he averted his eyes and cleared his throat.

"E-err..uh, you should go in."

"R-right." Bilbo obliged. Thorin flashed him a half-smile and started to walk away towards the opposite direction. Bilbo closed the distance between him and the door and started to grasp the brass handle when they, once again, turned to look at each other at the same time.

"I think I forgot something." Thorin murmured, padding his way back to Bilbo.

"What something?" Bilbo frowned. _"Like a goodnight kiss? Or perhaps a second date?"_

Again, neither.

Thorin extended his hand towards him, smiling. "We haven't even introduced to each other properly. I'm Thorin Oakenshield Durin, don't call me Thorin Durin, by the way. At your service."

Bilbo forced a smile as he took Thorin's hand, which was five times bigger than his. However, when his small hand and Thorin's large one finally meet, Bilbo felt a sense of happiness seeing the both of it fit with each other. It's as if it was the rightful place where they should be.

It's funny, thinking about how many times they held each other earlier and only having to feel the sensation now. Maybe because he was more aware of Thorin's presence?

"Bilbo Baggins, nice to meet you. And I'm at your service." this time, he gave him a genuine smile.

 

"Goodnight, Bilbo." Thorin bowed before proceeding his way back to his room. Bilbo did not have the chance to say it back as Thorin already disappeared into the darkness, leaving him alone by the doorway.

"Goodnight, Thorin." he whispered at the oak. When the door closed with a gentle snap, he finally knew why he was feeling so upset.

He wasn't sure if a magical moment like that would ever happen again, he wasn't even sure if he would see Thorin again.

 

Bilbo turned his back on the door sadly, the disappointment etched evidently on his face. He raised his gaze, only to find his best friend standing by the fireplace, looking at him intently.

His expression, the same with his.


End file.
